Blog of Perspectiveness

Hello, my fellow fellows.

The last few days have given me stuff to think about... therefore, in today's entry, I intend to live up to my tangential reputation, and ask some of the more rhetorical questions... if you happen to know any of the answers, please feel free to say them. Alternatively, you could not.


- Why are the things used in badminton called shuttlecocks? It's almost as if the creator of the game had a sense of humour and wanted to give the simple-minded masses a chance to make innuendos, such as "Badminton is a game of whacking a 'cock back and forth whilecst getting a good feeling out of it", or "I swear I served the 'cock within the designated area... but if you want to dispute it, I think we need counselling." Alternative causes for this theory are "Uranus" (rather humorously named "Urrectum" in one episode), and whoever made rugby balls oval-shaped, thus allowing the "rugby is played by people with odd-shaped balls" pun, with my little addition, "it's like man-porn anyway. That's why I can't stand the sport".

- Why doesn't anyone buy Cillit Bang anymore? Sure, it wasn't a good cleaner... but by not buying it, you are disappointing the lord and saviour of cleanliness. YOU ARE DISAPPOINTING BARRY SCO-- sorry, BARRY SCOTT!

- Why does Japan have the seemingly happiest culture, America have the most spoilt and patriotic, Greece have the most seemingly honourable, Mongolia have the most un-talked about.... and Great Britain have the major chav and emo crowds?!

- Who actually thinks many people will buy the fruit and veg at the harvest festival?!

- How can music make lyrics such as "There's a world outside your window, and it's a world of dread and fear, where the only water flowing is the bitter sting of tears" as popular a song as "I'll tell ya what I want, what I really really want (so tell me what you want, what you really really want) I wanna HUH I wanna HUH I wanna HUH I wanna HUH I wanna really really really wanna zigga zig AHHHHH"?!

- Why is it that simple things amuse us more than the complicated things in life? I mean, we're more obsessed with pretty colours than the workings of a deep space moonbeam generator (?!)

- Why is sex so disrespected in life, when war is comparatively glorified in comparison?! I thought sex was meant to be the most natural thing, and war was all blood, guts, and the taking of life... How many cases have you heard of Death by Sex anyway?! If anything, it causes life!! By this logic, pornography could be classed as acceptable!!! Ladies, gentlemen, ponder.

- Why do we have an obsession of trying to find out the answers of life itself, when we don't ask all available questions?! What if the world was created by a freak accident in the creation of the first sheep, for instance?

- Why do so many supposed Christians doubt that every single detail of the Bible is right? Let's take one example - Noah's Ark. What if there was such an animal as a Grozznigorg of which only one was created, therefore it could reproduce and therefore we laugh at the thought that once upon a time, they existed? And what's so wrong with a guy feeding five thousand with bread? Maybe the author of that particular fable didn't pay too much attention and mistook "people" for "ants". Maybe this was the ant version of Jesus feeding five thousand of his kind.

- Am I going to Hell when I die, just because I frequently say "oh God" when in distress? Or is that considered a compliment, how I'm thinking of the higher powers when in need. Or, indeed, am I even going anywhere in spirit when I die?

- Am I going to Hell after questioning what I just questioned?


People of the blog, I urge you ponder over some of these. Maybe the wiser of you can come up with some potential solutions.

Till next time, Jimbob :> xxx